How To Be A Gentleman: 15 Ways To Win Her Over With Your Charm

Feminism may be on the rise as women are fighting
equality in all walks of life, but that doesn’t mean we
don’t still appreciate the traditional values of an old-
fashioned gentleman. Learning how to be a gentleman and
charm her will serve you well.
Having a man hold the door open for you, pull out your
chair, and even walk around to the other side of the car to
help you out are not merely kind gestures. These are small
moments that show the lengths that a man is willing to go
for you.
What does it mean to be a gentleman?
Being a gentleman does not mean you are wimpy or
overly-sensitive. It does not make you weak or less macho.
In fact, being a gentleman gives you a leg up.
A gentleman is a chivalrous, polite, and honorable man.
These characteristics that make up a gentleman are more
than hand-holding and being courteous. They include a
proper sense of right and wrong, tolerance, and respect for
everyone.
So although you may want to learn how to be a gentleman
in the realm of dating, becoming a real gentleman goes far
beyond that and takes effect in all part of your life.
How to be a gentleman
What are some things you can do, say, or change in order
to be a gentleman? Odds are you aren’t the opposite of a
gentleman now, at least I hope not. So you aren’t starting
from scratch.
You have the ability to be a gentleman inside of you. You
just have to know what to do in order to bring it out. And
before we get into it, be sure you are not simply acting like
a gentleman. A gentleman is not just polite but is also
sincere and genuine with that chivalry.
#1 Notice when the moment strikes. You know in a movie
when the girl says, “Oh what a gentleman.” Isn’t that the
moment you want? Well, you can have it. And once you
get the hang of it, it will become like a second nature.
When it is raining, offer to share your umbrella with a
woman lacking one. Offer to help someone struggling to
load their car. Reach something off a high shelf. Be aware
of those around you that could use a gentlemanly act.
Being a gentleman is all about helping others, not just
yourself.
#2 Put in the effort. Being a gentleman isn’t about having
the ideal wardrobe, it is about what you do with the one
you have. I love jeans as much as the next person, but if
you are going to meet your girlfriend’s parents, you may
want to put in that extra bit of effort with some nice
ironed slacks.
Bring flowers for her mother and maybe wine or scotch for
her father. It is about making a good first impression and
you never go to someone’s house empty-handed. Think
back to shows like The Brady Bunch, what would the Brady
boys do? Making that extra effort isn’t showing off, it is
showing your intentions and thoughtfulness.
#3 Keep what’s private private. Something that can make
all the kind gestures in the world useless is spreading
secrets. A man can appear to be a gentleman at first
glance, but once he goes off and tells his friends or even
strangers something he shouldn’t, he loses that gentleman
title.
Now, what sorts of things shouldn’t you tell? Well, I like to
say if you wouldn’t tell your mom you shouldn’t tell
anyone else. You can tell your friends that you are seeing a
girl and she is cute and funny, but telling them anything
personal, private, or intimate is a big no-no.
#4 Have patience. Gentlemen can be in a rush, but they
always show signs of patience. You say excuse me when
you are rushing through a crowd. You wait your turn. You
may be charming, classy, and confident, but being a
gentleman is not playing a part. That means in all
circumstances your gentlemanly ways should shine .
This also goes for dating. Whether she wants to wait to
meet your parents, wait to kiss, or for anything else, be
patient. Any decent gentleman knows that the right lady is
worth the work and the wait.
#5 Respect women and elders. If you want to know how to
be a gentleman, remember that respect is a big one
because without it, all the other things don’t even matter.
Knowing that everyone deserves to be valued is a big part
of being a gentleman.
#6 Be honest. A gentleman never lies. It is as simple as that.
#7 Mind your manners. Manners are for more than toddlers.
Saying please and thank you is just the beginning. There is
a time and place for a curse or two, maybe at a game or
when you stub your toe, but shut down the foul language
in almost all other circumstances.
And remember that manners are not just for those you
want to impress. Be polite and courteous to service
workers, employees, the elderly, and children.
#8 Be open-minded. Being a gentleman does not mean you
can’t have your opinions and be sure of them. But it does
mean that you keep an open mind about others’ opinions
too. You may disagree with others, but you don’t judge
them for their thoughts or beliefs and you don’t get into
heated arguments.
#9 Read signals. Gentlemen are always aware of their
surroundings. Having attention to detail is an important
quality for a gentleman. What makes you stand out is that
you pick up on things that others may not notice.
Is your girlfriend chilly? Offer your jacket without her
having to ask. Is she uncomfortable at an event you went
to? Offer to take her outside. If you want to master the art
of knowing how to be a gentleman, being aware of what
other people want before they say anything or even know
themselves is a wonderful trait to have.
#10 Make the first move. Making the first move does not
have to be aggressive or pushy. In fact, it is romantic and
endearing. It shows you are a risk taker, but that you can
also read the situation.
Being able to make the first move portrays confidence and
shows initiative. Think Noah in The Notebook . He climbed
a Ferris wheel to ask Allie on a date, then asked her to
dance in the street. *SWOON*
#11 Be understanding. Part of being a gentleman is being a
spectacular listener. And that doesn’t mean being silent
while the other person, especially a woman, speaks.
That means actually absorbing what others are saying so
that you can give an appropriate and thoughtful response.
Being sympathetic to others’ situations mean actually
understanding where they are coming from.
#12 Keep your word. I know I already said that gentlemen
never lie, but keeping your word is different. No one
intends to break their word when they give it, but it tends
to happen. A gentleman doesn’t let it.
If a gentleman makes a promise or gives someone their
word, they find a way to keep it and know that from the
moment they initiate it.
#13 Be prepared and punctual. A gentleman is always
thinking. That does not mean you have to be a boy scout,
but having an emergency kit in your trunk and knowing
how to fix a flat tire can’t hurt.
Gentlemen are also punctual. You aren’t late for dates or
work. You think ahead and plan accordingly.
#14 Protect others. This does not mean you have to sign up
for the police academy, but it means you stand up for
others. If a woman is being harassed, you offer to step in
and walk with her. You never let a woman walk home
alone , especially at night.
If a child is missing his mother or an elderly woman is
lost, you help. As I said, a gentleman always puts the needs
of others before himself.
#15 Always offer. A gentleman always offers to pay for
dinner, lend a hand, or help in any way he can.